Truro, Live Bar, 12th January 2010

I woke up in sunny Watford, packed up my car and drove to Exeter to meet the rest of the dudes. Unlike my usual stoic road warrior self I had to stop three times to use the little boys room, one stop was merely 20 minutes after the one before. Do I need to see my GP? answers on a postcard/appointment card.

We planned to meet early and run through a couple of new songs and generally catch up. However due to traffic (Will taking all his coppers to the bank to get them changed into coins, the sum total of £3 for all tour, he decided to survive on cup a soups and beans all tour. He did. Will is fucking crucial) and snow (Will and Ed living in Kent, a foolish, silly place) Ed and Will were a bit late. While waiting for them I went for an amazing Turkish coffee with my friend Jo. Me and Nic then met the other two in Exeter then tanked it to Cornwall.

The drive down was…shit scary. Apparently the forces of nature and death had decided to converge on the south west of England to forge a path snowy destruction. Due to us having the constitutions of polar exploring bison however we were not bowed by this. It was totally shit scary though. Every time anything overtook us it sprayed grey snow over the windscreen and I lamented on all the things I have done wrong in my life and cursed the fact it looked like I was not going to have any chance to atone for them. However, we made it. I can go on living my sin-filled consequence free existence.

Bar 200 is cool venue, the upstairs looks a bit like the attic of the house from the Narnia film.

This is Will posing next to Saxon. Saxon is mighty.

We arrived upstairs and met Frank from Dueling Kazoo’s who is a thoroughly nice man. We met the Tall Ships dudes too. Stars didn’t collide, fireworks didn’t fire out of our ears, polar bears didn’t present us with keys to various cities but everyone in the room knew that something special was happening.  Also playing that night were gruff‘n’ready Ralph Lauren enthusiasts Bangers.

We went on first and had fun. My bass kept cutting out and we were a bit ropey as it was the first time we had all been in the same room in nearly a month. However, due to Tall Ships and Bangers both being from Cornwall there was a fairly sizeable crowd and they seemed pretty into us. At one point I got so excited I punched Ed in the chest. Then Bangers went on are we ace. If you’re into your org-punk and haven’t checked out Bangers you’re silly. Really silly.

You can see me in the background trying to fix my bass. I Failed

Tall Ships then went on and proceeded to colonise the Truro natives and farmed their happiness to fuel their spiritual fires. Their set culminated in a massive extended jam with the band handing out percussion to the crowd.

you need to got to at least one Tall Ships show in your life.

Matt spied us lurking at the back and proceeded to hand us a bottle of vodka. I don’t know what kind of percussive sounds we were supposed to get out of it. What a tool. Will drank most of it and denied those standing around us access to it by a cold shake of the head. Tall Ships were great, really great.

Will is not very generous.

After the show we loaded out and convoyed it back to Falmouth. Tall Ships were keen to show off their hometown to us and we hit many sea side hotspots including allegedly Europe’s worst nightclub Shades.

At this point i felt like Tom Hanks at the beginning of Saving Private Ryan.

That's me at the back requesting Fugazi. They played it. I'm total punx

After a few drinks were sunk and a few wrestling moves were thrown down on the dance floor we headed to a house party were we discovered that if you mix rum, cola and orange juice and serve it in a mug it looks like coffee. However, it tastes like regret. Even though we are probably the biggest party dudes you will ever meet (ha!) we were all super tired so retired to our new friend Ellie’s fisherman’s cottage to get some much needed rest.

I must let it be known that I am in a band with three other dudes whose concepts of much needed rest don’t exactly chime with mine. Nic get’s super tired and sleeps instantly like he’s dead, and I mean dead; totally motionless and relatively soundless apart from the odd whimper or garbled phrase. That I can handle. Ed can sleep anywhere and fairly instantly but my god he snores. It sounds like someone is ripping Velcro of an idling chainsaw somewhere inside his face. This has led to me setting up on the floor/sofa./wherever we’re sleeping loads quicker than Ed so hopefully I’ll be asleep before he falls asleep and the Velcro chainsaw is fired up. Getting to sleep has become a race for me vs Ed. Will usual adopts the ‘sleep where I lay’ attitude where he will get into his sleeping bag, fall over and that is his bed for the night. However, after he’s had a couple of drinks inside him he becomes much like a mischievous toddler on Christmas Eve. Getting him into bed is hard enough but getting him to be quiet is even harder. On this night he decided he needed a wee. Now you might think that a logical person would wee in the bathroom of the house we were staying in. Not Will. He decided to go outside. He was gone for ages. When he finally came back he revealed that when he was about to go an emergency light came on and he got stage fright. This happened 3 or 4 times so he ended a long way from the house in his pants. This stuff happens to Will a lot. This is one of the reasons why I love Will so much.

Ladies.

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One Response to “Truro, Live Bar, 12th January 2010”

  1. Luke Richards Says:

    So, Shades ain’t so bad after all? I wish more people would request Fugazi.

    Luke
    (DJ at The Biggest Mess in Town, Shades, Falmouth)

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